That got your attention, didn’t it? Ok, so that’s not totally the truth but I’ll explain. Back in July I told you how I had let ongoing stress take over, which ended up getting my hormones all out of whack, and I ended UP 15. Fifteen pounds that is. Part of me curses my favorite, fold over, flowy black pants for this. It was like they knew and didn’t tell me…I was inspired. I was ready to make some changes. My original plan was to come back two months later and tell you how things had balanced out. RECORD SCREECH. Nope, things hadn’t gotten better, in fact, they had gotten worse. My biggest struggle was getting enough sleep (did you know sleep is directly correlated to your weight?) and making time for exercise. Oh yeah, and the wine…the wine too. My cortisol was spiking at night which is the tell tale sign that adrenal fatigue is in full swing. From there… well, there it was just total bullshit. So I was tired but also wired all.the.time. I sorta felt like my body was slowly rotting.
Then it happened, right smack in the middle of PN program planning, fundraising, and operating a small business…I left town. We had a new niece to meet and I decided to tag on an extra week away to get some much needed Arizona sun. The whole idea of it was stressful. Actually, my heart races right now just thinking of the 21 days I was OOT, but I went for it. We touched down in Seattle, and I gotta tell you: we went into pure distraction mode for a full week. I’m not going to lie (again) and tell you that I didn’t work at all, but work became the sideline. We had a three year old + a newborn baby that became our worlds for that week. I was out of my element, no longer surrounded by reminders of all I have to do, no clock ticking in the background and an escape from all the fears of what the future holds. During that week, the ‘future’ was now. The present. What a concept huh?
We slept on a murphy bed. I did not jump into a $5,000 mattress. Yet I slept like I hadn’t slept since 2012. I shit you not. It was like my head hit the pillow and I was off to another planet, a planet where sleep happens. And so it began, many days of sleep replenishment that I believe have changed the chemistry of my body. This long awaited rest led to a total calmness in both mind and body, and with that came an added bonus of effortless weight loss. Was it 10 lbs? Probably not, but the thing is, I wasn’t counting. I was taking care of myself from all angles, and in that place of peace is where I saw the real changes happen. The truth about the 10 lbs is that emotionally & mentally – I DID loose 10.
Chemistry is king (and I failed horribly in chemistry). There are a gazillion ways to look at this. But here’s mine.
The food we put in our body is paramount, but how we carve out the time for ourselves goes hand in hand in this equation. I was invited to let all my worries go. Scary and exciting all in one. On this trip to the upper west coast, we stopped in Cannon Beach for a couple days. [PSA – if you haven’t been to Cannon Beach, you must. It will change your life]. We brought a kite from Matt’s childhood and set our sights on flying that thing. Cannon Beach is all about kites. In fact there there three kite stores just in that small town.
You see, in Cannon Beach it’s all about being laid back. Retail stores open ‘around 11am’. I mean, how awesome? I’m not a black and white, yes or no type of gal, so while this was a little interesting at first, the concept ended up feeling delightful. Essentially – we’ll get to it, don’t you worry. What a metaphor for life.
As we walked out of the store the young guy shouted to us, “Wait, wait, wait…. so, one thing you gotta do is let your kite go till the string is completely out, that’s 500 ft. And then just sit down on the beach and let all your worries go.” My eyes are full of tears just thinking about it. So I did.
Why am I telling this story? Are all my worries gone? What does this have to do with my hormones and gaining weight? In my mind, everything. Stress, doing it all, getting older, struggling with priorities – it’s the flame that lights the fire. So fast forward six months: no weight has been lost BUT I’m backing into this whole deal. I needed to compromise with myself, understand the layers for me, and start to put the damn puzzle back together.
Next up? I’m throwing myself into Prescribe 20. I’m going to let you in on a little secret here… the PN team isn’t always on the PN protocol. But I think you knew that. We do our best, know what works and what doesn’t, but in the end, we still need that dedicated time and support too. We created this program because we’ve heard what everyone wants and it’s what we want too – for you and for us. We all win. So, I AM READY. Changes becoming habits? More time for me? Yes please and thank you.
It’s the puzzle piece I’m ready and waiting for. Calendar marked, wine corked, getting serious about food being my fuel again, getting to hear from old friends and meeting a whole bunch of new ones. I can’t wait. Wholeheartedly, it’s about as excited as I’ve been in a looooong time.
Here’s to breathing deep, being vulnerable, and realizing that life’s certainly is dance.